This post is inspired by one of the “add me” photo challenges that I have seen amongst the stories of IG pals. A simple concept, to show four sides of your personality in pictures. In some cases, it was quite eye-opening to discover new things about the people whose posts are part of the daily algorithm.

But it got me thinking about how what we post presents a view of ourselves through our own eyes. It’s quite a narrow view of the person that we are! And often this means that we present ourselves how we want to be seen and not necessarily how we actually are. There are obviously some exceptions to this. There are people who are so unapologetically themselves that we get a no-holds-barred snapshot of their lives whether the good, the bad or the ugly. But those people are few and far between.

When I look at my content, it is quite curated. I am far more discerning to what stays within my grid, than I am on a story that will last 24 hours before inexplicably disappearing from everyone’s consciousness! When something hits the grid it usually ticks at least one of the following boxes:

• I’m feeling my best self
• There is an emotional connection
• The creative is on point
• It is linked to a piece of writing that I am proud of.

Far more posts fit into the first category, which probably says more about me than anything else. IG for me has been a way to document my journey, and as such it’s probably not too surprising that it is quite “self-involved” as an overall picture.

But what you see, isn’t always the full-story. There is no purposeful misdirection, or blurring around the edges, but there is always the question of Perspective – am I the best person to present an unbiased and rounded version of the person that I am? 

So with this in mind, I wanted to create a 4-frame picture which encapsulated how my nearest and dearest see me. And present a fuller sense of the person that I am.

Emotional

There is no denying that I tend to be an emotionally sensitive person, who is also led  by their personal emotions!  I “feel” to the Nth degree whatever point on the emotional Richter scale to me it’s a ten! 

I’m an emotional drunk, which is why I try not to feel overdrink. I can be quite self- involved because I don’t have great emotional resilience and my mood can spike or drop at a rapid pace. I’m empathetic. I hate the idea of something I have done causing hurt or pain to another person, yet I can say things in the blink of an eye that I later regret. (I’m a joy to live with…) 

I cry at weddings, funerals, a text message from a bestie & regularly over spilt milk. That’s just who I am. But I also laugh uncontrollably (also to tears) and am sensitive to others emotions and provide room for them to express this. The duality of being emotional is certainly present.

Determined / motivated

I have had to work hard throughout my life and things have not come easy. This narrative has shaped me as a person. I love a challenge, and am constantly looking for things to do. At any one time I will have projects on the go, be working and commuting, an active family life and supporting the community. I am determined to make the most of life, as I don’t want to look back and think “what if?”.

Being so determined can be a wonderful thing, overcoming challenges and hurdles gives a great sense of self. But the opposite is also true, to keep such a busy schedule means balance is hard to achieve and at different points in time the strain can be put on others.

When I commit to something I do it fully and whole heartedly, but I also have a tendency to over-commit – I and those closest to me all agree that burnout is always potentially around the corner for me, which is not necessarily a good or healthy way to live life. 

I respond well to goals and have learned so much from my fitness journey. I have learned that perspective from others can go a long way – and even on a personal journey  there is room for support, understanding and competition from others.

Steady

In the video for 2 become 1, there is a scene where Mel B is stood in a road and the world is speeding past as if on fast forward! (Thinking about it from an editing pov, that is probably exactly how this is achieved in the music video!) and this is me – quite often the steadiness in the chaos! 

In a constantly changing world, there I am. With a steadiness there is also an ability to be myself even when everything is changing around me. 

Steadiness is all good and all, but gosh can it also be exhausting. People can sometimes mistake me for a punching bag and emotionally that can be tiring to withstand. It’s the sort of quality that makes you good in a crisis but also an easy person to discard, or hurt because ultimately, I will likely forgive you. As a Steady Eddy it can often feel a bit mediocre, celebrating in others success and progress and still being stood in the street surrounded by fast cars. 

Creative 

I am a creative person. I can turn my hands to most creative pursuits (with the exception of drawing – I have just never mastered that one) but I am also a creative thinker.  Problem solving in real time and jumping in and out of the box when required!  I spend a lot of time thinking about potential outcomes of various circumstances so that if/ when they happen I appear to come up with a solution off of the top of my head! I can literally get lost in my thoughts and escape reality into a different world without much effort, the downside though is how forgetful I can be. I have to strategise and support myself against this weakness! I am terrible with names and facial recall is a struggle for me too which is tricky when you work in a business that involves networking and at its heart, PEOPLE. 

Creativity though, means that I can get a lot of pleasure from my own mind – it is freeing to sing or dance around the kitchen and I have an eye for angles, style and lighting. 

I flit from creative pursuit and often can’t focus on larger projects because my attention has been pulled elsewhere – which means there are always multiple crafts on the go.  I paint, I sing, I move, I cook, I write.

The finishing of a task is not often the goal – but more the creative journey itself.

When I look at instagram posts, the impression that we get of a person is a curated and purposeful view of the subject. So often, that image is just a tiny snapshot of the person as a whole – it is not a purposeful misdirection, more wanting to be viewed in a certain way. We are entitled to that, but we should also remember that we are more than a picture, that we post to our stories. And that sometimes the bits below the surface are some of the most interesting parts of a person.

Just some food for thought.

TIB